Where has the time gone, thinking of Brett

You know those times when you see something family and it triggers a memory.  Well that happened again to me today as I was riding into work.  I starting thinking about the late friend of mine Brett.  Brett died on the 7th July 2006, a year on from the infamous 7/7 terrorist attacks here in London England.  I met Brett through my website Transformers @ The Moon, and we use to meet up at different conventions, pub meets as well as chatting regularly online.  Brett's sudden death came as a heavy shock to me, and I could not, and still can't, help but partly blame myself.  I had not spoken to Brett for a few weeks and was wondering how he was due to him feeling low over affairs of the heart.

Well the 7th Jan marked 6 months since Brett's passing, and its dragged back a lot of the feelings for me.  Being at the halfway stage, I still can't help but wonder what Brett would be up to today if he were still with us, and what his thoughts would be on the recent Transformers teaser trailer.

It all came back as I came in and the sky somehow looked simliar to the time around early July.

I still feel that I owe it to Brett to better myself, my life and to try to do something in memory of him.  Brett and I had become closer friends in the months surrounding his death, and we often shared problems and worries, as well as giving each other reassurance and advise.  At the time, he was probably the closest friend I had outside of my twin brother and gf.

Looking back over the last 6 months I wonder if I have made any progress.  Sure I've changed jobs and moved my career into a different track, my relationship with my GF has continued from strength to strength, but I'm not sure if its enough.

For some reason I felt the need to type all of this into a blog entry, perhaps just to try to get some of the thoughts and feelings out of my head and heart which I can't help but feel is slowly re-filling with guilt.  I fear that some of Brett's other friends have forgotten about him.  To me, it was certainly the lowest point of 2006, a year which was certainly comprised of my typical roller-coast life, though in many ways I felt much more like a passenger this time round on the rollercoaster with others.

As at least a small tribute to Brett, my brother decided that the article which he wrote for Forbiddon Planet magazine here in the UK will be used as a logo on our new look website.  Though this small token will be missed by many, for those who knew Brett and realise the significance of the image, will understand that it is out way in trying to ensure that the place where we first met him trys to help keep something of his life alive.

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